my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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