I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Randomize
