so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
one two three fourrrrnication!
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She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
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