Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
