so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
