Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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