I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
my poor anus
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
