he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
