you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I think people are normalizing furries
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
This toilet bowl is my home.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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