I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Randomize