these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
