Non-Jews are for practice
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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