i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
