Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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