Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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