But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
