Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
