Did you just see the Batmobile???
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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