it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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