I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Randomize
