Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize