Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Randomize
