butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
