I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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