I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
