Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
