he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
COCAINE IS GR8
Randomize
