I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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