If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I supernannyed him into submission
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
