I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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