Betty ford says i'm here all night
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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