I am puke
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize
