hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Just puked most of my soul out..
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