I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
