My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
