I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
