If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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