once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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