He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
