i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy�
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
