it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Randomize
