i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
