I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You dont lie about slip and slides
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
