haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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