dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize