God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Your tits are I can't wait for
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Floor bacon is actually really good
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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