did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
