I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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