There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
