Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
